The doyenne of Irish modeling, Michelle Rocca, has been forced to relinquish her title of ‘Ex-Miss Ireland’, a moniker she has held since the year after she originally won the title. Henceforth she will be referred to in VIP, Sunday Independent gossip columns etc. as “Michelle Rocca, Ex-Ex-Miss Ireland.” She is rumored to be livid.
The shock announcement came at a press conference to launch the 2005 Miss Ireland competition. Chairman of the Miss Ireland Committee, Mr. Donald DeLane, offered his sympathies to Ms. Rocca, but suggested that she should simply get on with the rest of her life, and enjoy the honour of being an ‘Ex-Ex-Miss Ireland’.
The reason for the decision is unclear. Some have suggested that more recent Miss Ireland winners have considered the title of ‘Ex-Miss Ireland’ to be tainted. A source close to recent Miss Ireland winners claimed that, “Nobody wants to be bracketed with a load of old haggard windbags who won it forty years ago. They all look like rancid roadkill.”
Efforts to ‘reclaim’ the title of Ex-Miss Ireland began in earnest some months ago. A standoff between members of the Miss Ireland Committee and recent winners of the title ensued. Matters came to a head when Ex-Miss Ireland and Ex-Miss World, Rosanna Davidson, threatened to horribly disfigure her pretty face with an electric sander. The top brass relented, thus inventing the rule that anyone who won the Miss Ireland Award ten years ago now had to work under the soubriquet of “Ex-Ex-Miss Ireland” or “Former
Ex-Miss Ireland”
Ms Rocca’s threats to horribly disfigure her face with a sander were met with bemusement, everyone assuming she did that a long time ago.
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3 comments:
OK so yeah, I have a little too much time on my hands...just read this for the first time...3 years after it was posted. TOTALLY HILARIUOS!! Thanks ever so much for the great laugh. Well put/and Fair Play...Shana
You Shana Morrison bu any chance?
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